Ka-blammo.

As of May 4th, I will answer to the name "Fusion Bomb", I'm considering having my driver's license changed to reflect that moniker switch.

They're fusing my ankle. Yup, removing my ankle joint, jamming in some big screws and forcing the bones to grow together. My foot will be permanently ready for ass-kicking due to its fixed position.

I will be missing about 3 months of work thanks to this little excursion into orthopedic crazytown. I have so much to take care of between now and May 4th, I fucking hate money I don't have.

So yeah, that's my shitass week at a glance.

Oh, but I was still down 0.2, there's always that.

Goddamn. They're gonna fucking fuse it. At least I'll be pain-free.

xo
lb

Cut the crap.

Emotional/stressful bullshit is going on in Thuseyland. I'm not going into most of the details because it's lame. The other shit has to do with a return trip to goddamn bone doctor happening on Friday to see what the fuck is going to happen to the rat bastard Frankenankle. I think it's pretty clear that I'm not happy at the moment.

Now that it has been established that I've been in emotional/high stress bullshit zone this week, let's get down to fat camp business:

It shall be known from here on in that I'm an emotional non-eater. This entire week, I couldn't have cared less about food or eating, despite my emotional upheaval that could have prompted the year's takings for the Curry Garden in one night flat.

That being said, I want it noted that despite this lack of appetite or interest, I still made myself eat three meals a day plus snacks whenever possible. I didn't avoid my food and eating responsibilities, even though my poor stomach wished i would.

All this shitty week, one for the record books, I did not cry and I did not starve.

And I lost 2.4lbs, putting me at 269.2. yes. the 260's.

It took over 6 months to get out of the 270's. I may make another appearance there due to my close proximity to them right now, but for now, I am out of them and going in the right direction.

Suck on that, 270's.

xo
lb

This is why I have a day job.

It's "Family Day" here in Ontario (I know, isn't that the lamest fucking name for a stat holiday?) so I have the day off. So far, I've sat through 2 talk shows, I walked away from "the View" (because I'm smart) and I've nearly finished the sweater I've let sit for too long.

Just now, the phone rang. Understand this: the phone rarely rings here, because I'm a hermit. Of course I'm going to answer it, because it could have been a family member (it is FAMILY day, after all) or my favourite person, or friends looking to avoid talking to their families, so they'd like to talk to me.

Or, despite being registered in the government's "Do Not Call Registry", where I am registered through 2013 (I checked), it will be a telemarketer.

I hate telemarketers. That is why they are, by law, not allowed to call me. That's what that registry is all about.

Today, a telemarketer called me. Here's how that shit went down:

LB (me): Hello? [echo...pause...] HELLO? (annoyed!)

Telemarketer (TM): hello ma'am, I am calling from Annoying Window Replacement Company Who Shouldn't Be Calling You Because it's Against the Law. How are you today?

LB: How did you get this number?

TM: We have done work on [Bleep] Street in the past, that is how we got your number.

LB: That doesn't make sense.

TM: Yes it does. [Sorry, what? did you just fucking say that to me?!?]

LB: No, replacing windows on another house on my street doesn't result in you getting my phone number.

TM: I'm calling today to tell you about...

LB: No, you're taking me off your list. That's what you're doing.

*CLICK*

Alright window company, consider yourselves reported. You stand the chance of being fined for dialling the 10 digits it takes to make my phone ring. You asshats.

I want to put the following in the phone book beside my listing: this person does not need her ducts cleaned, windows replaced, tickets to the circus, carpets cleaned, a better internet connection, a better cable package, or tickets to a sporting event she doesn't give a shit about. She doesn't believe for a second that she's won a cruise, a car, or a barbecue. She will not call in regard to a credit card account she does not have. She will report you. Find a better job.

Oddly enough, this is the most family-related thing I will do all day because I know, somewhere, my step-dad is laughing his head off in agreement.

xo
LB

Run for cover.

Consider my motherfucking shit about to be lost.

A big ZERO in the progress department today.

I am so beyond frustrated, I don't even know what word to use. And I know a lot of fucking words.

I need something to smash. I need to scream at the top of my lungs.

Yeah yeah yeah, the silver lining crap can come later. Right now, I'm too frustrated with myself to think of that horseshit.

Eventually this ugly little tantrum will be done, but for now, everything sucks and I hate it.

xo
lb

keep swimming.

Another 0.8 gone this week, which actually felt like a fucking miracle. All day friday I walked around feeling like I was made of lead. The feeling hadn't really changed yesterday morning leading up to the scale so I was sure the game of lose/gain/lose/gain was going to continue for another week.

But lo and behold, the scale went down a little bit putting me closer to being outta the 270's. I have so much water on me right now, I really am a fucking marvel of science. I say that every month but fucksakes, I'm just waiting to hear slooshing as I walk.

I don't have too much to say today (GASP.), I'm totally in the knitting zone. I'm busting down the stash and cranking out socks for feet in need.

Still attempting the skating thing, it's getting to be less of a shit show but oh man it ain't pretty. Love the skates, gravity and balance don't love me so much.

back to the needles, and a big ol' cup of coffee. The bright winter sun is shining through the front window and I'm gonna make like a cat and just spread out and bask for the rest of the day.

peace oot
LB